mccarthy cures autism

DISABILITY

Good news folks. Former playmate and MTV Singled Out host Jenny McCarthy has discovered the cure for Autism. All it takes is a detoxifying diet and some magic crystals and wammo: the magical cure. Of course the immunization/mercury link has long ben dispelled by serious researchers - but with autism rates multiplying ad infinitum the weekly newsines are getting restless. (My own hypothesis would be the silicon implants breast feeding angle - the silicon that is, being an indicator of a mother believing in whatever wiccan methodology is emanating from the popular occult of the era). Well the autism explosion has a lot to do with Rainman - no one wants an ordinary "retarded" child, when you can, with a little affluence and money, get a premium diagnosis as Autistic. Everyone assumes that means the savant variety - high math, memory and or music skills. Why is there a popular rejection of the continuum of human life? Some people are born with God given talents and others are lacking but that does not make anyone less human. Doctors often advise mothers of prenatal detected down syndrome that most mothers choose to abort - that to add comfort to a borderline defined genocidal action. The real traits that humans should judge others on are sincerity, integrity, and love, not physical nor cognitive disability. Rather than frantically searching for cures, it would be better to work on acceptance and reasonable accommodations.

belt drive

FASHION

Rosanne apparently free from having any type of career going at the time (singing the national anthem was definitely not an option), decided to donate time at the local charity. They were in the middle of a canned food drive and asked her to head the committee assigned for the winter clothing drive. This was prep work - right up her alley. She called the first committee meeting to order with the banging gavel struck three times. The last time was really loud and every one stood at a standstill. She blurted out "Everyone take your seats now c'mon!" Everyone discontinued their meaningless banter with their peers about the weather and who was doing what and they all promptly sat down. Rosanne announced that if anyone wanted to hear the minutes of the last meeting to speak up - but she kept rambling on about the business of the committee and no-one was given a chance to hear the minutes. She moved and seconded her own motion to scrap the winter clothing drive - seems how Santa Monica was not all that cold in the winter - she deemed the poor folk would have to make do with their summer clothes. She then proceeded onto the next topic of business: that being the drooping pants, boxers/thong showing issue. "Well," she declared, "I slapped DJ across the living room when he tried to leave the house looking like that." So she moved and seconded her own motion, that for fall, that they - the prestigious committee that is - would round up belts in a massive belt drive - to be dispersed to inner city poor kids and young adults who had a hard time keeping their pants up. Someone mentioned suspenders - but it was not heard among the ensuing ruckus.

third party foul

COERCION

Evidence points to inequality of decision making. Some people routinely make good choices as judged by society while others routinely shoot themselves in the foot. The scientific management model of modern liberals assumes rough genetic equality with observed differences explained mostly by environment. Using a diminishing marginal utility model, they can explain lazy unmotivated peoples behavior. How some people actually accomplish things like having transportation to and from this thing called a job to pay for their food and shelter is explained away as benefiting from past wealth/opportunistic chance. Problems of society are posited as though a solution exists rather than an eternal plague of humanity. Wealth redistribution (theft) is a favored solution of the modern liberal progressives. With a little articulate moral gymnastics they don't see this as stealing nor coercive. Classical liberals on the other hand assume genetic inequality (some are dumb) but have the hubris to know that third parties (even the elite minds) make even stupider decisions than stupid people would have made for their own lives. This is because third parties are often isolated from any negative feedback loops that the individual more directly experiences and use to adjust their behaviour. Human evolution since the dawn of civilization has only been 10 thousand years - only a blink of the eye in evolutionary time. Humans ultimately only have hunter/gatherer brain power. Classical liberals often appear looking foolish by acknowledging societal problems often have no government solution, but modern liberals throw out answers and remove all doubt.

crucify u.s.

PACIFISM

With their freudian religious undertones slipping out while trying to sound secular the pacifists wish for the nations crucifixion. You see the nation has been a sinner of late, actually for most of its existence. The numerous taints on the nations soul include stealing Indian land, slavery, industrialization, segregation, nuclear weapons, Vietnam, cold-war realpolitik, Iraq 1, post cold-war idealism, Iraq 2, global warming, ect, ect.... and all the other problems of the world. Now we need to be put back in our place - to be humbled. We need our hubris checked - our resolve weakened. We need our superior beliefs made inferior. Only when the nation has been crucified - only when barabbas or his modern dictator equivalent is released - only then can we begin the dialog amongst ourselves and other nations - only then can the human planet all join hands in a giant friendship circle - only then can pacifist candle light vigils commence in all time zones across the newborn earth. Our nation state must die to purify our progressive soul.

sports fanatics saved souls

SPORTS LIBERALISM

Troy Smith could not have won the Heisman trophy without Maurice Clarett. They never played on the field in the same year - but came in on the same recruiting class of 2002 at The Ohio State University. Clarett played as a true freshman Autumn of '02 winning the national championship. Then he filed a fraudulent insurance claim summer '03, and was suspended from the team. After only one year in college, he sued the NFL to let him in the draft early, was denied, then drafted a year later but released after pre-season. He committed armed robbery Winter '06 in Columbus (where a few people might recognize him) in the midst of signing to play in Europe. Then, Summer '06, he refused to pull over to police who found he was driving with a bullet proof vest and had three concealed handguns. He then struck a deal to go to prison for 3-1/2 years and a consolidation of charges against him. Somehow college athletics could not save Clarett from the streets, much to the dismay of sports-fanatics. But they were able to capitalize on Smith who also had a tough childhood. Smith was involved in a few campus disturbances and received money from boosters - resulting in missing a bowl game and not starting a critical home game against Texas. But Smith repented and grew up with the help of his head coach - sports writers and Heisman voters went ecstatic. After loosing Clarett to the dark side, the sports-fanatics found redemption in Smith. That is what they believe in after all - the power of sports to change peoples lives for the better. Sports healed the Nation after Sept 11th. Football healed New Orleans, and football is now healing Virginia Tech. Aren't we all happier now?